[SALTBURNT AU INBOX]

[homosexuals]

WELCOME TO THE SALTBURNT NETWORK

USERNAME:
HZF

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Comments

[homosexuals]

You look awfully engrossed. What're you reading?

...Kidding. Christ Skippy, you could give a man a heart attack like that.

[holyposition]

Something embarrassing. A trashy thriller. I'm on vacation!

I'm just innocently working on my tan out by the lake. No reason to panic 😘

[homosexuals]

Just what the doctor ordered. I'd take trashy TV if I had the time.

It's a nice tan. It'd be even better without any lines. But you sure look good enough to eat. Head to toe, even.

[holyposition]

You've got all summer! You'll have time for trash, I'm sure.

I'm not an amateur, there won't be any lines. Wouldn't want anything to distract you while you're eating me up.